modesty, patience

Posted: November 22nd, 2010 | No Comments »

my goals for today: modesty, patience, gentleness, quiet integrity. i got really worked up last night because my friend came over and crush #2 came up, and basically, BASICALLY, she was like, he’s totally playing you, and he’s done this exact same thing before, and you’re an idiot (a nice idiot). it bummed me out immeasurably.

  1. because what the fuck?! WTF?
  2. yes, people make mistakes. and yes, they often repeat the same mistakes. but people ALSO make the same mistakes because they’re hurt and trying to figure something out. and things change. and not every situation is a replica of another one. i’m not going to be egotistical enough to say i’m different and specialer, but…aren’t i?
  3. mostly i’m just driven bananas by the idea of CAUTION. be smart, don’t play with fire, don’t tease animals, don’t hang out with racists, but trying something…that feels awesome…how can i not do it? should i ignore my own feelings? ignore the first gentle real thing that’s happened to me in a long time? because something painful might happen?

no way. i’m going to just let it float and float and enjoy it and just see what happens. if i get burned, so be it!!!!!!!

EXCLAMATION POINT EXCLAMATION POINT!



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