thingssssss

• loving the marfa public radio music show archives (specifically the other side of nowhere, night train, and rock pillow)
• watched bohemian rhapsody last night, mixed bag, but overall enjoyed and found it quite sad — that old motherfucker of fame ≠ happiness. plus rami malek is incredible in it, and the guy who plays brian may — so genial.
• watching a movie with ross on a saturday night = AWESOMENESS
• not entirely buying the CBD trend but i tried one of these bath bombs and i was NOT sad
• still have end goal of being a total stoner — step one, start smoking marijuana
• enjoying the new job, though it’s complicated in regard to humility and past accomplishments and backsliding and ego, BUT what is all that, really? bullshit, folks! see bohemian rhapsody and garry shandling for proof. but very stoked on health insurance, 401k, free shift drinks (!!!!!), and trying to make mail order customers’ dreams come true (already cried twice about sweet orders intended for people going through hard times) (commerce is complicated but can be beautiful?)

big thief

i keep thinking about this

“The public library is an excellent model of government at its best. A locally controlled public good, it serves every individual freely, in as much or as little depth as he or she wants.”

— John N. Berry, “A Model for the Public Sector,” 2001

ps avoiding my school assignment

on ross’s prescription bag

is this a new QA thing? it’s kind of awesome to be reminded there’s a person on the other side, just hope it doesn’t have dastardly effects

one thing

one thing about living here — it, a little bit, feels like endless obligation, like you have to go to someone’s show, attend this meeting, speak to so-and-so, etc. etc. perhaps obligation isn’t the right word — it sounds so onerous, and yet…it’s not as choice-driven as commitment — so maybe it is obligation.

but also — i’m wondering if that’s just the nature of community? and if so, kind of UGH, but then kind of like — maybe that’s why community is cool? but then truly double UGH, cuz while i want to be a totally cool team player and love (in theory) (the idea of) community, i also hate being tied down to anything that i haven’t actively chosen. i want to choose all of it, always, and anything that isn’t my choice makes me feel resentful (even though it might be cool as hell).

THE END, OFF TO BED, KEEP IT TRILL

ps this just came up because yesterday, i worked on my school assignment, cleaned, baked, did mega laundry, and watched isle of dogs, and it was so dope to be so…free. i was wondering if this is why i liked portland so well? i had my little crew of pals and my job, but no other outside tethers to make me feel pinned down.

this dress

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2019. Photo by Giovanni Giannoni/WWD.

(but do not look at the shoes)

continuing on

hi guys, i’m still here! still always wanting to post but having trouble juggling a full-time job and school and cleaning and laundry and dogs and having three sets of houseguests in one month. some boring things:

• ross fixed the hot water in the bathroom, so i can take baths for the first time in a year, and it is heaven!
• supposed to be working on my school assignment but rewatching isle of dogs
  
• courtney inexplicably, incredibly gave me a six-month subscription to this thing called universal yums, where they send snacks from other countries, and honestly, it is the coolest, best present, especially for new flavor/snack lovers like myself. first month was germany! couldn’t wipe the smile off my face, also everyone prepare to be gifted universal yums
• these leaders in virginia who wore blackface: i’m like, WTF? like seriously: WTF. but WTF in red and 3000 point font with blood dripping off the letters. how can this even still be happening? after all these years. how long does it take to scrub evil from humans. can you?

QC By Cha

it’s the little things

should i try it

recipe for happiness in khabarovsk or anyplace.

by lawrence ferlinghetti

(via laura olin)