i’m kind of into this list, especially the mediocrity part

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0zhPTlnVJt/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

at last

me, as i am

• got my new glasses (pair #1) (went full tilt after having zenni glasses for the past three years and listen, no disrespect to zenni, she did me well when i needed it, but hello two pairs of progressives, WE’RE BACK, BABY), anyhow i’m a little worried because people have noticed the new glasses but been like, “are those your new glasses” and me is like “yes” and that’s the end of the conversation. hoping pair #2 elicits more positive feedback. but whatever, as kara brown says, “I can only be me. Me, as I am” [in strange glasses]
• kara brown! forgot about her but my cousin was making pasta, which sent me to kara brown’s pasta making blog and it is SO funny. it is not updated all that often anymore (two posts in 2019, i don’t think so), but i laughed multiple times while catching up. for instance: “Ina [garten]’s recipe doesn’t call for any butter with the sauce, but it also calls for penne and I ain’t doing that.” guys you know how i feel about penne. also this:
  

  A brief aside: I was looking into exactly what type of wine would go best with this sauce since it does have have both cream and tomatoes and it turns out it doesn’t really matter–both red and white can work for this. One chef suggested champagne and I loved it because as far as I’m concerned, champagne goes with everything: moments of celebration, moments of sadness, a bowl of cereal the morning after a night that may or may not have involved dancing on a bar. Although I take the risk of being accused of being in bed with Big Champagne, let me say it again: champagne goes with everything!!!

  anyway there is so much good in that blog, read it to feel like a human and also chuckle a few (THOUSAND?) times

• i got one of those mechanical keyboards for my birthday!!!! i’m not sure why i decided to go that route but my typing sounds mad professional
• can you tell that grad school started yesterday and i can’t even bear to look at my class syllabus, which i have to do ASAP and probably turn in an assignment tonight
• every night these days i wake up at 4am and i’m like this: [AWAKE]. i keep telling myself that i’m going to go ahead and get up but it’s so dark and —
• clyde, my little clyde, isn’t eating much anymore — snubbed dairy queen french fries AND a burger tonight. which is just not him, not even on a bad day. eventually he ate a bit of chicken sandwich meat, which i hand fed him, but you can see it’s not good. but what next and how does one prepare for any of this. life is really fucked. here he is, looking presidential two weeks ago (sometimes i honestly think he looks like george washington — such heart, such wisdom):

this song is good and i’m not even an ambient music person

from jia tolentino’s recommendations somewhere

just a lot of life lived

ME

lately i’m just really feeling like i’ve been around a LONG time. i mean — let’s not mince words, 45 years is a long time. four DECADS. or decades, as others say. so many things under my belt. i mean besides these major awesome things like getting married and being a godparent — but a lot of wild and scrappy stuff, like the time when that hot 22-year-old drummer offered me a piece of gum and then proceeded to put half in his mouth and leave the other half for me to take from his mouth (me: oh WOW, it’s gonna go like this?). or when carolyn and i went on a double date to a brewpub in portland (lolz). or when david beebe hit on me at a wedding, after i had the stupidest crush on him 14 years earlier. or my trip with dan, julie, becky, and matt to southern france and northen italy. swimming in that castle pool in alba. swimming in cadaques. swimming in céfalu.  when carolyn and i had to go to tucson to present our company’s shamefully under-developed software projects to the city — we were so embarrassed, and so brave. or all the rock shows i went to alone. all the rock shows that crushed me (the constantines, the hunches, blood on the wall, townes van zandt [x2], thee oh sees, jay reatard, death from above 1976, explosions in the sky [x2], dirty projectors, les savy fav, vietnam, wolf parade, and 100s more that i’m forgetting). riding bikes and sharing burgers with t’chaka. listening to chad’s overnight show on froggy 94.7FM and requesting eddie floyd’s “knock on wood.” seeing ross play music for the first time. riding the nyc subway to a job interview in the middle of summer, with sweat pouring off me. not getting that job. being flown out to california and interviewing with eight people for a job at yahoo!. getting that job. flying a redeye to patrick and claire’s wedding. seeing george saunders read at a bookstore in SF. eating at chez panisse with jonah on the fly. hearing the strokes is this it? for the first time with dave macdonald at the elbo room. meeting courtney and caroline and john in high school. getting sugar-rim drinks with steve hely at some awesome old-school NYC bar and then seeing annie baker’s circle mirror transformation. seeing greg in all his plays while he was at tisch. the st. louis blues winning the stanley cup. walking home from greg’s through the snow. I MEAN HOLY HELL FORTY-FIVE YEARS!!!! i’m not saying i’m done, i’m just saying, it’s already been FULL.

oh just the latest

• scared — legitimately scared — about school and work colliding on august 26. “i can do it” [wobbly voice]
• blasting a lot of silver jews and thinking about greg enlow and dave berman and pain and addiction and a moment of decision
• drinking a lot of spearmint tea (based on this article, my new bible)
• becoming even more passionate about the benefits of copyediting, PEOPLE IT IS IMPORTANT
• new godmother to townes braxton ittner — couldn’t believe it, now a godparent to two, can’t let it fluff my feathers and eclipse its important and serious duties

darling, put on some lipstick, and let’s see how it goes

Abrera after rehearsal at A.B.T. Photographs by Brenda Ann Kenneally. Courtesy of the New York TImes Magazine.

from the ny times magazine’s “a star is made” about ballerina stella abrera:

Another mentor of Abrera’s, Georgina Parkinson, also danced through her 40s. Parkinson was a wild and fabulous figure in London during her time as a principal ballerina for the Royal Ballet. She was a ballet mistress at A.B.T. when Abrera joined the company. “She took me under her wing,” Abrera said. “She was hilarious. We would be doing some hard phrase, again and again, trying to make it work, and she’d say, ‘Darling, put on some lipstick, and let’s see how it goes.’ ” Abrera explained that it meant something like try to feel differently about yourself, try to lighten up. It could change how you approach the step. It wasn’t really about appearance; it was about a feeling, about getting some distance.

colleen herman

Colleen Herman

you are the person you are

advice from how to think about work from toni morrison (through her father), via laura olin’s cup of ambition newsletter:

That was what he said. This was what I heard:

1. Whatever the work is, do it well—not for the boss but for yourself.

2. You make the job; it doesn’t make you.

3. Your real life is with us, your family.

4. You are not the work you do; you are the person you are.

“Perhaps he understood that what I wanted was a solution to the job, not an escape from it.”

atlantic city