best of 2012 (a partial list) (in no particular order)

Posted: December 31st, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

family
friends
sir ross cash
kleenex
scrawny christmas trees
marfa thrift store
bow ties
wrangler jeans
riding a stationary bike while watching law & order: SVU (though a grisly way to start the day)
cutting all the sleeves off my t-shirts
vacationing in austin
third year of halloween costumes with hilary
that marfakind black-and-white skirt
neil young live, even for 20 minutes with 40,000 other people
red nail polish
late show with jimmy fallon (surprise entry)
buffy st. marie’s “helpless”

 


worst of 2012

Posted: December 31st, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

unnecessary terror


anxiety reaches sky high levels

Posted: December 31st, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

cannot sleep anymore in the mornings. wake up with racing heart and racing brain.

2013 will bring back night yoga, rodney yee, sleep vitamins, meditation and attempt to dissociate self from the human world.


rest stop el paso

Posted: December 29th, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

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holiday dogs

Posted: December 27th, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

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lucky (hunchback)

Posted: December 27th, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

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albert brooks, part 3

Posted: December 23rd, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

from the vanity fair interview:

I did a bit on The Tonight Show, early on, this bit Alberto and His Elephant Bimbo. I was a European elephant trainer. I came out and I was dressed up with a whip, and I was distraught because the elephant never arrived, and I said, “Look, the show must go on. The Tonight Show, all they could get me was this frog, so I will do my best.” So I took a live frog and put it through all these elephant tricks. Every time he did a trick I threw peanuts at him. And the last trick, I said, “I call this trick ‘Find the nut, boy!’ I gave the peanut to somebody on the stage. I walked over and gave it to Doc Severinsen. “The elephant will find the peanut!” I took this frog. I threw this black huge cloth over him, the one I said I used to blindfold the elephant, and this black rag started hopping all over the place till it eventually hopped over to Doc Severinsen. It actually found him. I didn’t know what the hell the frog was going to do. So after the bit I sit down at the panel, and Jack Benny was on. There was always that last two minutes where Johnny was asking people, “Thank you for coming—what do you have coming up?” And during the last commercial Jack Benny leaned over to Johnny Carson and said, “When we get back, ask me where I’m going to be, will you?” So they came back. Johnny said, “I want to thank Albert. Jack, where are you going to be performing?” And Jack Benny said, “Never mind about me—this is the funniest kid I’ve ever seen!”

J.A.Wow.

A.B. And it was this profound thing. Like, Oh, that’s how you lead your life. Be generous and you can be the best person who ever lived.


found in the draft archives: albert brooks, part 3

Posted: December 23rd, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

from the vanity fair interview:

He [Harry Nilsson] was friends with Keith Moon. The Who were staying in Century City, and Harry said, “Come over. Keith is here—we’re having a thing.” Now, listen to this. I had just done a Mike Douglas in the afternoon and flew back from Philadelphia. And I come walking down the hall, and the housekeeper says, “Oh, you were on Mike Douglas—you were wonderful.” “Thank you so much.” I go in the room, and in about 20 minutes Keith Moon threw the television out the window. It was 16 stories up. And now the room is destroyed, and I’m going: I was recognized—I got to get out of here! How can I get out of the Century Plaza without being seen? Because I know in court she’s going to go, “The guy on The Mike Douglas Show!” You know?

keith moon throwing that tv out the window. god bless him.


albert brooks, part 2

Posted: December 23rd, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

from the vanity fair interview:

I made Modern Romance. People used to stop me on the street. I get this a lot, where they honk their horn and roll down the window and a couple says, “We got married because of Modern Romance.” I don’t know what to do. I feel so bad.

J.A.What does that mean?

A.B. I don’t know.

J.A.That means, “We both like it.”

A.B. That means they’re both screwed up.


albert brooks, part 1

Posted: December 23rd, 2012 | Tags: | No Comments »

from the vanity fair interview:

If I’ve learned anything, anything, getting older, it’s the value of moment-to-moment enjoyment. When I was young, all my career was “If I do well tonight, that means that Wednesday will be better. That means I can give this tape to my agent and … ” It was this ongoing chess game. And that is a really disappointing game, because when you get to checkmate, it never feels like it should. And there’s another board that they never told you about. So if I come here and talk to you, if I have an enjoyable three hours, goddamn it, that counts.