nostalgia

been having mad nostalgia today. i made a joke about marrying an old high school crush to courtney, and then i started looking at said old crush’s facebook profile and it sent me down a WEIRD ASS road. just remembering those old high school feelings but also feeling skeptical. but a FEELING skepticism. like getting my little teen self but also being like, man what the hell. then i looked at another old high school crush’s facebook profile (i had a lot of crushes in high school, whatever, i was a straight nerd who only understood how to do algebra II, eat rice krispie treats, read harlequin novels, and throw raging frustration tantrums.) anyway, just looking at these guys, it’s like, man, life is so weird. WHO ARE THESE GUYS NOW?! they look old! really they look old. but the same, too. that’s the part that is so nostalgic, and sad, how they look the same if you keep staring. but so different. but the same.

it takes a sensitive soul

this feels so true, from my experience with ross, and what it takes out of him (and gives him) to make music, via pitchfork’s “what it means for djs to grow old”:

But 46-year-old Berlin DJ Daniel Wang knows the other extreme: He has never drank or done drugs, but he says he understands why geniuses like Miles Davis and Nile Rodgers have. “It takes a sensitive soul to dedicate their whole life to the abstract emotions and sensations of making and playing music,” he muses. “Who says that the only correct model of living is abstinence, austerity, and therefore longevity?”

just a pretty sky

guys feeling cheerful today, even though a little hungover. i blame yoga!!! yoga with adriene, to be honest. i am two steps away from writing her a thank you note, i did the 30 days of yoga and really liked it, now i’m doing the back care videos and it makes me feel…spacious. not to be a square yoga person.  let’s be real, i will never be a square yoga person, as my fitness level will always be moderate. like how my hair is brown. i am just a moderately fit person, and that is as far as it goes. i would just rather sleep or watch the daily show in the bath than work out intensely. actually maybe sitting in the bath and watching the daily show is what made me feel cheerful. or maybe a combo of bath, daily show, yoga, and clyde resting his head on my arm while doing yoga. and also listening to little wings now.

also here’s a good thing: getting to leave awesome feedback for a company or person, i LOVE it, i just gave a glowing review to rackspace, plus thank you for the opportunity to revel in your excellent customer care.

pure bliss

clyde resting his head on my arm

vegetables for soup

 finger for scale

blue tape, other loves

today i’m like a striking rattlesnake. STAY BACK

LIKES

• lily tomlin in big business
• blue painter’s tape
• that major lazer song still
• sunset boulevard
• renting jaws at 10pm and realizing maybe not the best bedtime lullaby
• my new middle part
• hanging my laundry from a clothes line for the first time
• friends who just randomly drop off banana chips and champagne splits
• ross this morning admonishing me not to yell at him, me: “i’m not yelling.” him: “you’re yelling in your mind.” me: “that might be true.”

DISLIKES

• doing a google image search for “striking snakes”
• ross having a work phone call at 5am
• jury duty in pecos on friday (1.5 hours away?!)

theme of summer

WAFFLE CONES

let’s gain all the weight

• haven’t been working hard at all this week or maybe even last week, maybe all month, let’s be real
• got in a fight last night with ross about italy where i actually stomped my foot and left the room in a huff — “ONCE A BRAT ALWAYS A BRAT”
• accidentally have been watching a lot of npr tiny desk concerts (MIDDLE AGE)
• my skin lately is that of a troubled teenager + an old desiccated sack
• would really love a lap blanket at the office and also maybe a hearth
• i keep saying “i’m dead inside” to people as a half-joke but i wonder if this is potentially poisoning my human soul well
• i’ve been doing so much research about italy, and the food, my lord, i’m going to eat it all and get as fat as possible: pasta, gelato, gelato in brioche (WHAT) (this doesn’t even truthfully sound that good to me but i deeply support the idea of it), fresh ricotta, fresh ricotta on the spot pumped into cannolis, pistachio pesto, sundried tomatoes, more pasta, please, yes, please, let’s gain all the weight.