well, you’re garbage so the rules aren’t the same for you

from roxanegay:

I am full of great advice and lofty standards for my friends. Do this, don’t put up with that. When it comes to myself, it’s like, well, you’re garbage so the rules aren’t the same for you. I get mad at myself when I realize this, when I realize how passive I can be, how I try to be invisible in my own life, how I try to not take up space or require anyone else’s attention or energy. Seriously, I am not a role model. I am 41 and I am basically a trainwreck. I am sitting on my sexy couch chewing ice. The ice is great. My teeth are like, “Girl, what is your fucking problem?”