life is complicated

being with another human who moves through the world completely differently than you — also complicated. does it get easier or does it stay hard. does one person just have to soften up? (i wanted to write “give in,” but that explains my whole problem.) do both people soften? how does it work. i want to be a better, easier person but it seems like i’m always butting up against my brittle self. how to break that self?