being a woman is just constantly hating your immediate present self and then looking back and hating your past self for not appreciating your beauty and opportunities at that time and it just goes on like. forever
from helena fitzgerald’s essay about the yeah yeah yeahs’s “maps”:
Another thing Maps is about is how much better it feels to think about these things after the fact, how with some time a fiction settles over certain memories. I think a lot about Karen O playing that song over and over for the rest of her career, as the lyrics transformed from a present hurt to a distant memory, the long slow triumph of it becoming monotonous and losing its sting, just a song, until the only person left who existed in the story was herself, standing onstage doing the same thing for the thousandth time.
liked this question from apiece apart interview with pastry chef natasha pickowicz (mentioned her awesomeness before here):
“We have all had curvy paths. Please list all of your jobs, since you were 16.”
i started to answer myself (what else is this blog but my personal opportunity to answer interview questions), but it was terribly boring and long cuz my path has been perhaps too curvy. some standouts, tho: waitress at star pizza (i was terrible) (i dropped a giant glass of water on someone’s lap TWO TIMES in the three months i worked there); short stint as the texas rodeo mascot, rusty rodeo; a temp AT a temp office; grading standardized tests (a strange look into our educational system); ID checker/bouncer at planet marfa (i was also terrible at this). i’m hoping there’s a “finally” in my list (as a children’s librarian, everyone pray for it!). also natasha mentioned this song in her interview and how did i never know it?