Posted: April 30th, 2022 | Tags: | No Comments »
meme saying "you raggedy bitch" that i screenshotted from somewhere

guys went to the amazing texas library association conference and i was surprised by how unmoored i felt about the whole experience — i almost started crying checking in. which was so weird and embarrassing. i mean, yes, it was all new and foreign, but still…when did i grow so insecure and unsure? and relatedly: why am i so quick to diminish my accomplishments? it’s the legit opposite of how you’re supposed to be in the world at age 107. i think about how i moved to marfa and didn’t know anyone and just rolled with it and just somehow i’ve lost that spirit. is it being in marfa? was it ballroom? was it the long road through grad school and having to really humble myself to make a living? is it being so removed from my support system and just losing my way? WHY DON’T I WANT TO BE SEEN? anyway. it was a wonderful experience but lonely and unsettling and i was honestly glad to be back in marfa.

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