vibing

none of these would look all that good on me but what looks (sorry for the hectic screenshotting / cropping). courtesy of bode.

(trying to find my old self)

i guess this might be depression

OK, my hard things are not that hard, but I do wanna say that being in a couple…can be hard (soft hard). maybe challenging is a better word. r and i are really not getting along these days, and it’s so sad. he’s frustrated by me being ~less than~ (stressed for two years, sickly, neurotic, no vacations except family obligations, etc etc). which i get. i mean yes, that is no picnic. opposite of picnic, actually. a dungeon. which makes me feel worse. but… what can i do? i’m honestly trying everything (loose use of the word “everything”): acupuncture, stretching, therapy, vitamins, mantras.

i guess i just feel a bit lost these days. like where is that old person. hardly remember what being a fun person feels like (if i ever was one). feel like everyone — especially ross — thinks I’m a debbie downer. which I guess i am?! (am i?) (I beg you to say no)

flowery shirts

absolute nerds

from aminatou sow’s primo-rino newsletter gentle suggestions:

Late bloomers are late bloomers for many reasons but one thing a lot of us have in common is that we are absolute nerds. I love that for us. Lean into it hard. 

I AM SEEN

i think we can all agree

chris parnell and other thoughts

HEY! NOW SOME ANnOUNcEMenTs!

• every time chris parnell is on screen, i’m like, this guy is so good and so underrated. hear it now!!!!
• also let’s be real, cher is unreal. i will prob cry every time i hear “believe,” moonstruck remains genius.
• though i prefer seeing people with real old faces and not all that smooth tight stuff but to each their own
• after watching all the SNL 50th docs, howard stern highlights with cast members, all-time best sketches, the radio city music hall concert, and the live 50th show last night — i’m a bit high on SNL
• unrelated, i feel like i’ve run into so many older people that have bitterness or resentment… please don’t let me get dour about things
• saw this in fran magazine about BRIDGET JONES: MAD ABOUT THE BOY and it hit me (bolding my own)
  On surface level and in title alone, this seems like some typical Bridget Jones nonsense: she once again has to choose between two hot guys (Leo Woodall and Chiwetel Ejiofor — good work, these are two hot guys) for some reason and she continues to show up to work with bad hair because she is frazzled. Those aspects of the franchise, for lack of a better word, don’t especially interest me but they don’t piss me off either. I don’t think the who-will-she-wind-up-withs of the Jonesiverse really tell us anything or show us anything compelling about this character or modern womanhood. What a relief, then, that this is so mismarketed — a much stranger movie than any of the previews or promotional material would let on. It’s a romantic comedy that asks, Does getting the guy do anything to prevent the slow and inevitable march of time or cruelty of the world? 

this hits uncomfortably close to home

good grub street from writer tony tulathimutte:

You are forgiven for assuming I’m not a good cook, but I can follow instructions, and if other people are involved, I’m happy to put in the effort. I used to cook a lot for my ex-girlfriend Molly, for instance, because she was even lazier about it than me. The one time she offered to help, I told her she could prep the potatoes, and she put a potato on the counter and just looked at it.

action breeds clarity

first of all, jude law is great. second, saw these in a newsletter and man they feel timely. the story of my current life.

the annual more/less list

now called the “away/toward list,” but same idea. also: related

just a dirty hippie at heart

bought this Santa Maria novella patchouli soap and the scent is pure heaven